Don't swear on your mom

That it's the first drink that you've had in like a month

No, don't say it was just

An isolated incident that happened once

There's no need to pretend

I've never seen an ugly truth that I can't bend

To something that looks better

I'm stupid, but I'm clever

Yeah, I can make a shitshow look a whole lot like forever and ever.

You don't have to lie to girls

If they like you, they'll just lie to themselves

Like you, they'll just lie to themselves

You don't have to lie to girls

If they like you, they'll just lie to themselves

Don't I know it better than anyone else?

All of your best excuses

No, they don't stand a chance

Against all the chances I give you

Isn't ideal, but damn

You don't even have to try

Turn you into a good guy

You don't have to lift a finger

It's lucky for you I'm just like

My mother (and my sisters)

All my (all my friends)

The girl outside the strip club getting her tarot cards read

We love to read the cold, hard facts and swear they're incorrect

We love to mistake butterflies for cardiac arrest.

You don't have to lie to girls

If they like you, they'll just lie to themselves

Like you, they'll just lie to themselves

You don't have to lie to girls (don't have)

If they like you, they'll just lie to themselves

Don't I know it better than anyone else?

Girls will cry and girls will lie and

Girls will do it 'til they die for you

They'll cry and girls will lie and

Do it 'til the day they die for you (ooh)

Girls will cry and girls will lie and (ooh)

Girls will lose their goddamn minds for you (oh)

They'll cry and girls will lie and

Do it 'til the day they die for you.