I like apple pie

And you like banoffee

We both love shopping for furniture

And meeting for coffee

We pretend we're into art galleries

'Cause it makes us feel clever

We're both in our element when we're on our knees

Whatever the weather

Chorus

I could be your fag hag

And you could be my gay

I'll never make you feel sad

When you come out to play

(Repeat)

We don't give a fuck

What people are thinking

I know you'll always look out for me

When we go out drinking

I can ask you things I can't ask anyone

And you'll give me direction

Apart from me, you're the only other person I know

Who reads the travel section

Chorus

Be my gay

Chorus