If you save yourself for marriage

You're a bore

If you don't save yourself for marriage

You're a whore-able person

If you won't have a drink

Then you're a prude

But they'll call you a drunk

As soon as you down the first one.

If you can't lose the weight

Then you're just fat

But if you lose too much

Then you're on crack

You're damned if you do

And you're damned if you don't

So you might as well just do

Whatever you want

So...

Make lots of noise

Kiss lots of boys

Or kiss lots of girls

If that's something you're into

When the straight and narrow

Gets a little too straight

Roll up a joint, or don't

Just follow your arrow

Wherever it points, yeah...

Follow your arrow

Wherever it points.

If you don't go to church

You'll go to hell

If you're the first one

On the front row

You're self-righteous

Son of a...

Can't win for losing

You'll just disappoint 'em

Just 'cause you can't beat 'em

Don't mean you should join 'em.

So make lots of noise

Kiss lots of boys

Or kiss lots of girls

If that's something you're into

When the straight and narrow

Gets a little too straight

Roll up a joint, or don't

Just follow your arrow

Wherever it points, yeah...

Follow your arrow

Wherever it points.

Say what you think

Love who you love

'cause you just get

So many trips 'round the sun

Yeah, you only

Only live once.

So make lots of noise

Kiss lots of boys

Or kiss lots of girls

If that's what you're into

When the straight and narrow

Gets a little too straight

Roll up a joint, I would

And follow your arrow

Wherever it points, yeah...

Follow your arrow

Wherever it points.